Why I Became a Sexpert

In every interview and in every conversation that involves my career as a sexpert, the question is always asked of why I began this work.  Not only is it uncommon to see African American women in the space of educating about sex, but the way that I choose to teach about sex is sometimes baffling.  I choose to skirt the line of the overt, displaying techniques on how to get into position and how to arouse the senses while maintaining a standard of decency and class.  So how did I get my start, and why and I so passionate about teaching the masses about sexuality?

Well, this desire all started when I felt my modeling career was on a decline. After years of trying out to make it on “America’s Next Top Model”, I finally made it to the show (Cycle 10), but even after impressing the judges and being a fan favorite it wasn’t enough for me to make it into the final competition.  I can’t lie, I was crushed.  I began to question if being a career model was for me if politics were going to play a major role in my acceptance.  So, I began to look into other ways to bring substance to the world.  A year prior, my father had a conversation with me urging me to use my talents as writer.  “Don’t waste your God Given Talent,” he said to me.  “Because honestly your writing will get you everything you want…including modeling.” He didn’t care what I wrote about, he just wanted my voice to be heard.  At the time when he said this, I brushed him off a bit, but kept his wisdom in the back of my mind.  It wasn’t until I reached a moment of questioning my career path in April of 2010 that I began to seriously think about beginning a blog, but about what was the question.

After dealing with several lovers and realizing that my relationship life was taking a hit, I began to think about the other women in the world who could also be dealing with my same woes. On top of running from commitment, my ovaries were being attacked by ovarian cysts that made having sex quite painful.  I later found out that one of the cysts was a large as a small ball and was weighing heavily on the organ that is as big as a walnut.  I was in and out of the hospital monitoring my condition, and I became frustrated.  Cysts are common among the women in my family, and then I began to think about the thousands of women that could be going through the same issues with their health as I was at the time.  At this point I had a grand epiphany to begin a blog all about sexual health and technique, because even in the midst of my medical issues sex still held a heavy influence in my life.  It was the one subject I thought about most outside of the subjects of beauty; fashion; and entertainment, but the only subject that would keep my attention long enough to make me want to wake up every day and blog about it.  That’s the first rule of blogging: you must write about a subject that will encourage you to put pen to paper daily.  I figured, women can learn a lot from the things that I’ve been through and by reading the reports of the research I do on my own.  Yes, I started Glamerotica101.com as a way to connect with women and to empower women across the globe to become sexually confident and free.

See, society doesn’t do a great job at encouraging women to be the sexual beings they are born to be, and I figure what greater way to add substance to the world than to help women embrace who they are mind, body and spirit.  Once I began my blog, the response was overwhelming because so many people already know about me from my modeling days, and it took many by surprise.  Here I was, this beautiful girl who is quiet and quite reserved when it comes to my relationships and my display of sexuality, and then out of nowhere I’m telling women how to properly perform fellatio and how to get into sex positions that satisfy.  I have to be honest and say that I was nervous at first when I began because I didn’t know how I would be received by the world, but my passion to liberate women was greater than the possible rejection that I might have gotten.  To my surprise, my boldness and courage to speak out was embraced, and now almost 4 years later my blog is affecting millions around the globe and touching lives in a positive way.  So if you’ve ever wondered why I started my blog, here it is.  My dad encouraged me to do it and my mom nudged me to push the button to begin a blog that I talked about for two years before I pulled the trigger.  My family, while they haven’t always understood certain aspects of how I teach, has been supportive of my career moves in sexuality and continue to support me in present day. But honestly, it’s the outcry from women and men that keep me going.  To get letters from women in Nigeria and men from the middle east who are all affected by sexual issues that read the same fuels me to keep going on my journey of sexual enlightenment.  All in all, I’m doing this for YOU! Give me your sexual woes and I will give you solutions…because the business of sex education is my business.


I hope this piece shed a bit of light into my world my frame of thinking.  You will be seeing more pieces like this one that let you into my personal life.  I figure the only way for people to become comfortable with the teacher is for the teacher to become personable.  Hope you enjoyed my journey to Glamerotica.